Tommy Oliver still wasnít sure what had happened over the past couple of weeks. The month had started out fine. On the first Monday of the month he had been working out in the Youth Center when he got his weekly letter from Kim. Adam had been kind enough to read it to him, but the contents, well, werenít the usual. He still couldnít believe some of the things that he had hear in it. He couldnít actually believe that Kim was dumping him. It was so out of the blue without any *real* explanation. And Kim had done it in a letter. It was so unlike her to do something like that, especially to Tommy after all he had been through.
Tommy tried to sort out all of the jumbled thoughts in his head, but he noticed that he couldnít focus on one particular thing. His heart hurt too much for him to do that. It was the first time that month that heíd actually been able to be alone. As soon as he had gotten that letter, everyone had tried to help him out. Kat and Billy had followed him to the lake the very day he had gotten the letter when all he had wanted was to be alone. They then ended up taking him up to the mountains where they attempted to fix him up on a date. Like that girl Heather actually could have made him forget about Kim. However, Tommy knew that his friends were just trying to help him, so he had plastered on the Oliver smile and gone out with her. He had thanked God though that the date was interrupted.
Next, there was the whole thing with Kat. Kat had set up a dinner for Heather and him but had ended up eating with him instead. He did admit . . .it had been nice. Kat is one of the most beautiful women he had ever laid eyes on, not to mention sheís considerate, intelligent, and kind. However, it was only nice, for that moment. When he had looked into Katís eyes while they were dancing he had realized . . . she wasnít Kim. He had tried repeatedly to stop thinking of Kim and focus on Kat, but it just wasnít possible. He had felt so guilty smiling at Kat and leading her on, but he knew how much she was enjoying herself. And Tommy Oliver being the person who he is put Katís feelings over his and finished the evening with her.
The next couple of weeks had been marked by many attacks, but that hadnít stopped Tommy from thinking about Kim. She devoured every minute of every day. Even when he had tried to keep busy with his studies and karate classes thoughts of her had invaded his mind and stopped him dead in his tracks. Self-doubt, depression, anxiety, and extreme hurt had been feelings Tommy had been consumed with for the past couple of weeks. However, the past week had slipped by him without a thought of Kim, and Tommy Oliver found himself lying on his bed Friday night thinking of Kim .. . and coming to terms with his emotions.
(Kim, I just donít get it. What did I do wrong? Where did I go wrong? I feel completely empty and torn inside, and yet I donít feel that bad. I donít know if itís because some time has passed by or what, but you arenít occupying my thoughts as much as you did before and after the break-up. You are the single most important person in my life, but Iím starting to feel the pain subside in my heart. Whatís happening?)
Tommy rolled over and quickly brushed a tear away from his eye. He lay there staring at a picture of them at Homecoming the year before and not being able to comprehend what he was feeling.
(This canít be happening) Tommy Oliver thought as he jumped off of his bed and began to pace around his room.( I canít actually be trying to forget Kim, can I? I mean sheís the most important person in the world to me. Sheís the only person that has ever been able to help me through the bad times in my life and . . .wait a minute!! Sheís not here now . . .never the less, I actually think Iím starting to get over this break-up. How can that be? Kimís my everything. I donít want to forget her. I donít want this pain to go away. All I want is her back!!! )Tommy crawled out of his window and sat down on the small ledge beneath his window. As he stared up at the moon, tears bean to flow down his face freely. (This canít be happening . .. can it?)
(I remember just holding her while she cried when she found out that her mother was moving to Paris. I was the only person she would tell anything to. She told me that we were so solid before she left, and then she sent me that damn letter. She said nothing could ever come between us and that weíd always be together. I just donít get it. How could she say she loved me more than life itself if she was able to forget about me so easily in Florida?)
(Why is this happening to me? After all I have been through in my life . . .how could I deserve this? How could she do this to me? Sheís knows how much Iíve been hurt before. But she was still able to send me a damn letter. It couldnít be that she was sick of putting up with those dark feelings . .. could it? No, it couldnít be. Kimís always said that helping me was when she felt her best. Maybe,) Tommy gulped and hung his head down at the thought, (she wanted that normal life weíd always talked about? Maybe she was sick of me focusing on the Power Rangers. She always said sheíd give anything to be able to go on a date without hearing that darn communicator beep. Now that sheís not a ranger . .. she has that opportunity. Maybe she wants to forget everything that is associated with that and live a normal life. Kim is always willing to fight for evil and give as much as she can, but there is a point when you can only take so much. Jason and the others have left and moved on. Maybe Kim just wanted to too, without me.)
Tommy climbed back inside and left the house heading towards the park, more exactly the lake. (I can understand her wanting to move on. I just canít understand her not wanting to explain that to me. I guess she was probably afraid of hurting me. Kimís not good with having to tell someone bad news. She always says she can never get anything out because she doesnít want to see the personís reactions. She used to say that writing things down on paper was so much easier. I guess she just couldnít face me. Maybe she didnít want to have to tell me that I was going to be alone again.) Tommy smiled ruefully at the thought. (Iím pretty much used to being alone though. Itís never really bothered me.)
Tommy, who had been lost in though, stopped dead in his tracks and chuckled at where he had ended up: on the rock ledge that he had been practicing a kata that fateful day when he had shared his first kiss with Kim. He could still feel the soft texture of her lips pressed against his. (Stop it! Thatís . . .thatís in the past. Iíve got to stop wishing I can change things back to the way they were because itís not going to happen. Even though Iíd give anything to be with her, I have to realize that sheís made her choice.) Tommy then tugged at a thin, black leather string tied around his neck. He didnít even flinch when it snapped. He looked at the ring hanging from it, Kimís ring. Tommy shook his head as he remembered that night before she left. They had stood there at that same very spot he was standing on right now and declared their undying, ever-lasting love for each other. (Ever-lasting, yeah right.) They had exchanged their class rings as a symbol of their love. Kimís ring had been way too small for Tommy to wear, and Tommyís ring was way too big for Kim to wear, so they had both hung them from leather chords around their necks. It had meant the world to them at that moment. It had been the most important moment in their lives. (And now itís nothing. Itís just a speck in our memories which has little significance. Tommy looked down at the ring once more. If you can forget me Kim, I guess I can forget you too. At least Iíll try too.)
Tommy then threw the ring into the lake and stared at the spot where it disappeared as if something magical would happen that would change everything back to how it used to be. But nothing happened. Tommy stood there for a couple more moments then shoved his hands into his pockets and slowly began to make his way to his house.