Author's Notes: Here I go again. I never really even supported the Tommy/Kim thing! Don't get me wrong, Kim's great, and I REALLY love Tommy *wink* it's just that this song just says, Tommy/Kim to me. Don't worry, my Kat/Tommy one is coming. :) This song is from N'Sync and is titled, ""Drive Myself Crazy".

And a special thanks goes to Cynthia, for helping me out when I thought this didn't seem right. :)

Love that Drove Her Crazy
by: Kari

Kim melted into Tommy's kiss, and when it ended she gazed lovingly into his eyes. He smiled one of his perfect smiles and swung her around in his arms, all the while she giggled like a child.

Kim sighed. She pulled the blankets up closer under her chin and stared up at the ceiling. Her dorm room seemed confining and small that night. Ever since she'd written that dreadful letter 2 months ago, her world revolved around thoughts of Thomas Oliver.

Curses, why did I ever write that?

Cause you wanted him to move on with his life. He couldn't do that with you and him still a pair. A second voice reminded.

Kim scowled. Stupid conscious. She pushed away the bad thoughts and concentrated on the good thoughts. Memories of all the time spent together, the kisses, the hugs, the shoulder to cry on...

She turned onto her side and looked at the glowing red clock. 1:37.

"Sleep...I'm never going to get some sleep!" She mumbled. Across the room her roommate Danielle slept peacefully.

That's because she has a wonderful boyfriend she's been dating for 2 years, and you dumped yours to go out with the invisible man!

She thrust her pillow over her head hoping to block out the inner voice.

An hour later, still tossing and turning, her mind filled with guilt and regret, she leaned over to her nightstand and flipped the radio on. She kept it low as not to wake Danielle and waited for the commercials to end, hoping for a song to cheer her up.

"And now," the DJ boomed cheerfully, "a song for all those girls and guys who are missing an ex!"

Kim hit herself on the forehead with the heel of her hand and reached to turn it off just as the song started.

Lying in your arms
So close together
Didn't know just what I had
Now I toss and turn
Cause I'm without you
How I'm missing you so bad
Where was my head?
Where was my heart?
Now I cry alone in the dark

Kim felt herself being in the singer's place, knowing exactly what this song was saying. Sure as heck wasn't encouraging, but Kim made no move to turn it off.

I lie awake I drive myself crazy Drive myself crazy
Thinking of you
Made a mistake
When I let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
Wanting you the way that I do

Kim sniffled and realized she was crying. Oh stop it, Kimberly. It's your own fault that he's gone. He would have easily waited for you. Kat's just a rebound!

Is there any way to shoot your conscious?

She pulled her blankets off and walked over to her small desk, all the while the song still played.

I was such a fool
I couldn't see it
Just how good you were to me
You confessed your love
Undying devotion
I confessed my need to be free
And now I'm left
With all this pain
I've only got myself to blame

Kim turned on her small lamp and glanced at Danielle. Danielle mumbled something in her sleep and rolled over toward the wall.

Kim let out a sigh of relief and opened her top drawer to fish out some paper and a pen. She would just a write a hello note. She couldn't bear to tell him about the letter. Maybe she could tell him she broke up with him. Who him?

Would Tommy dump Kat and take Kim back?

You wish.

Shut up...

Kim blocked out the silly fight going on inside her head and focused on the song.

I lie awake
I drive myself crazy
Drive Myself crazy
Thinking of you
Made a mistake
When I let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
Wanting you the way that I do

Kim picked up the pen and started the letter: Tommy-

Just thought I'd write you and say hi. How's Angel Grove? Florida is just great. I'm going to a national competition next week. Maybe next will be the Olympics! That'd be nice...
How's Kat? I

Kim dropped the pen. She couldn't do it. She was so jealous of Kat! How could she say she was happy for Tommy?

You better be happy for him, you inconsiderate heartless feign!

"I'll show my stupid second personality! I'll write the stupid letter!" Kim grumbled.

Why didn't I know it?
How much I loved you baby
Why couldn't I show it?
If I had only told you
When I had the chance
Oh, I had the chance
Drive myself crazy
Oh, so crazy

By 4:30, Kim's garbage was full, and she was back in bed crying.

She had thought about it for a long time, but nothing decent came to her head. She had no idea what to say to him! Every letter she tried, she ended up starting to talk about Kat, and then crumpling it up. She'd finally given up after her stash of stationary had been cleaned out.

Just as she was drifting off to sleep, her alarm went off. Kim realized how stupid it was of her to stay up all night, especially when she was practicing for a national meet!

She rolled out of bed and threw her bathrobe on. Slipping into the bathroom, she turned her shower on, waiting for it to get warm. She peeked out the door and saw her mate just stirring. She hopped in quickly so Danielle wouldn't have to wait long.


Throughout the day, thoughts of Tommy took over her mind and got her in a heap of trouble. Her coach ended their practice by yelling at her. Kim was humiliated in front of her entire team. By the time he had finished lecturing her about messing up numerous times in practice, she was ready to crawl in a hole and die. She ran into the locker room and as quickly as possible gathered her things up and headed out of the massive gym.

She brushed away a hot tear. She wasn't sad, just completely embarrassed. As she walked down the street, she passed a Hallmark store. Not knowing why, a brightly colored card caught her attention. She stopped to read it.

On the front it said, "I just want to drop in and say..." and it had a picture of a monkey hanging upside down in a tree. Wanting to know what it said inside, Kim entered the store and walked around to the window display. She picked up the card and opened it. Inside was a simple little word, "Hi". It said everything she wanted to say to him, without mentioning anything about Kat.

She bought the card and ran the rest of the way to their dorm a couple blocks down.

She dumped her gym bag on the floor and plopped down at her desk. Opening the envelope, she got the card out and lay it down on her desk. Inside she wrote, Dearest Tommy, I saw this card and realized it was just for you. I wanted to let you know that I am and will always be proud of you, and will always love you.

Your friend,

Did I just say I love him?

Well, don't you?

Of course.

Then stop blubbering and send the letter.

What about Kat?

Who says he's gonna tell her? Who says he doesn't feel the same way?

Knowing he didn't, she dropped the card into the envelope and jotted the address down. At least I'm letting myself know that I still love him, even if he doesn't feel the same way about me.

"Heck, maybe I can move on now. There's that cute boy in my English class," She muttered aloud.

The song she had heard last night played itself through her mind.

I lie awake
I drive myself crazy
Drive Myself crazy
Thinking of you
Made a mistake
When I let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
Wanting you the way that I do

"How true, how true..." Kim whispered, walking down stairs to put the letter in the mail box.