Power Rangers is owned by Saban, I do not mean to break any kind of copyright, or
"Will I Lose My Dignity?" is a song from the Broadway Musical RENT I do not know who
owns the copyright, but I don't mean to break that one either!
The Characters Joseph and Sioban (pronounced Shivan) are my own…
Will I Lose My Dignity?
~Will I lose my dignity? Will someone care? Will I wake tomorrow, from this
He sat at the desk, looking at the picture sitting next to the computer, listening to the CD
play. You left me alone. You were my friend, Joseph. My friends back home don't
understand me anymore. I've changed too much. His mind was reeling from the past year's
events. Joseph and he were roommates, and soon to be brothers. He was marring Joseph's twin
sister Sioban. The tears stormed down his face. His friend was gone, all because of AIDS, a
blood transfusion, and a drunk driver.
He sat down and opened up to the last page in Joseph's journal. Writing that last entry
had been Joseph's last request, wondering if the person who gave Joseph his blood knew that he
I don't know what to write in here. I know Joseph got AIDS due to a blood
transfusion when he was in his accident. He told me all this, but I wasn't expecting on how
slowly it took his life. I never had to deal with anything like this back in Angel Grove.
Why did this have to happen to him? He was so talented, had so much to live for.
I know, a lot of people say that about loved ones that just died, but he was different. He was one
of those people that thrived at the challenges thrown at him by the world. You tell him that he's
got six months to live, and he lives 10 years past that! His eyes shown with the brightness that
outshone the sun. His writing made people with the coldest of hearts, weep in sorrow.
Joseph died after three months of suffering. At first, it started as a simple
headache, but grew. He started getting cold chills, then could hardly stay awake for more then
four to five hours at a time. We took him to the hospital after two weeks of the constant falling
asleep. The doctors told us that he had very little time left, and had some unpronounceable virus.
Some kind of pneumonia, I think. I can't…
He put the pen down and looked at the picture, tears streaming down his cheeks. It was
of Sioban, Joseph and himself. His friend was gone, and there was nothing he could do about it.
This wish was harder then he expected.
"You going to be okay?"
He was startled by the voice in the doorway. It was one he hadn't heard in a long time,
looking up, he literally jumped to greet his friend. "BILLY!?!?! What are you doing
here? When did you arrive?"
"I got back to Angel Grove last night. Tommy called me, right after Sioban got a hold of
him. He thought you could use a friend."
"He was right, but why didn't he come himself?" He looked at Billy, then to Joseph's
bed. It had been almost two months since either slept in this room. He had spent most of his
time at the hospital with Joseph, or at Sioban's house, getting what little sleep he could muster.
"Kat. She's arriving from London today. Their coming up after that. What you
working on?" Billy glanced down at the open leather bound book on the dark Cherry Wood
desk, noticing the young man's handwriting in it.
"A promise, but I can't seem to get it written."
"Write it from your heart!"
"How did you?"
Billy pointed to the open book, and smiled. "This, and Sioban told me that you were
probably having difficulties with it."
He smiled, looking once again at the picture. "She knows me better then anyone I use to
"Yeah, even her!"
Billy placed his hand on his shoulder, looking at him. "Think of what your true feelings
were about him. Write about that. Don't write about what happened to him, but who he was."
Billy looked into his eyes and saw how tired he was. "When was the last time you had a good
He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. He couldn't remember.
"Then when you finish with this, get some."
"I will, to both things!"
"I'll leave you to your writing. I'll see you later!"
He watched as Billy left. Good friends like him are hard to find!
I should be able to do this right this time. After some inspiring words from an old friend,
I should get it right. I hope!
Greatness filled his life,
Spirit filled the place.
Gestures that went beyond,
What normal friendship means.
He filled me with questions,
He gave me a reason,
He introduced me to love,
Letting me know it still exists!
I am grateful
I owe my life.
You will be missed Joseph,
Your friend forever,
Adam close the book, smiling. "I did it Joseph. I kept part my word. Time to keep
yours. I'm taking this down to the publishing company. I'm letting them publish it, if they agree
to your terms. That any and all profits go to AIDS research and education." Looking over to his
own bed, he sighed, knowing full well he needed the sleep. He did something he never thought
he'd do again, not since the day Joseph threw up in his bed and went to stay with Sioban, curled
up in Joseph's bed and cried himself to sleep.