What is Love?
by : Cryptk1165

It was another sunny day in Angel Grove. The Spice Club members were hanging out at the Surf Spot where they always do. They didn't have any major plans for the day, but a few of them were about to make some.

Adelle walked up to the group and handed two notes to Jenny and one to Spinal.

"Mail delivery," she called.

"I love mail delivery," C.C. said.

"Not if it's from the scum of the universe," Spinal said, opening his letter.

"Really? Who's the note from?" the Cryptkeeper asked.

Spinal read his letter aloud.

My dearest Spinal,
I would like to make a deal with you. I challenge you to a one-on-one battle. If you win, I'll leave you alone, for you will have proven that I just don't deserve you. However, if I defeat you, you must be mine for eternity. I promise that you will enjoy it. Just think, you and me ruling supreme over the entire universe! Meet me at Angel Grove park at 2 p.m. sharp with your answer. Don't be late, or I'll send the Quantrons to nab you.

your true love and Queen of Evil


"Sounds like Astronema is being sweet on you again," said the Cryptkeeper.

"Astronema is not sweet. She's evil and I hate her," Spinal told him.

"Well, you gotta walk up to her and tell her that," C.K. said.

"No; he doesn't have to do that," Jenny said. "I never told Elgar that I hated him."

"Then what can I do?" Spinal asked.

"Go ahead and accept her challenge. You can beat her. Andros beat her once."

"What does Andros have to do with anything?"

"Andros is the average Power Ranger. He's good, but Astronema knew him well. She knows what he's capable of. But she doesn't know you. She doesn't know what you can do, which gives you an advantage."

"I see."

"You have nothing to lose by fighting her," Jenny went on. "It could be the only way to get her off your skull."

"You're right," Spinal said. "I'll do it."

"Now what about your letters, honey?" asked the Cryptkeeper.

"Oh . . . yes." Jenny opened her letter. "Well, whaddaya know? This one's also from Astronema."

To the Spice Club,
I just wanted to remind you that I think you all are the most vile objects that ever crossed this universe. The Spice Club is a poison that must be purged from this planet! Hell, you guys are even worse than the Power Rangers!! And since I can't kill you all, I'll have to throw the lot of you into the nearest black hole. Once you're all through, your precious Spinal will be mine. Nothing will come between me and him, not even the annoying Speedy Spice! Goodbye, Spice Club . . . forever.


"Throw us into a black hole, will you?" Jenny asked. "You gotta catch us first, honey."

"We're worse than the Power Rangers? That's something to be proud of," C.C. said.

"Okay, Jenny, who's that last letter from?" asked the Cryptkeeper.

"Well, let's see." Jenny opened the final letter. "Whoa, what a surprise! It's from Elgar!"

"Uh-oh," C.K. muttered.

Jenny read the letter aloud:

Dear Tonfa Spice,
Hey, baby! I'm not writing for another marriage proposal. I just wanted to ask you something else. Wanna go on a date? I know I've been horrible before, annoying you with those proposals. I thought I'd slow down a bit and ask you on a date. Trust me, we'll have a good time. You'll find out that I wouldn't make a bad husband; I'll see to that. Meet me at the park at 2 p.m. sharp. Oh, and bring Spinal with you. Astronema wants to meet him there, so she will be with me. See you there. Kiss kiss!!


"Well," Jenny said. "I'm sure you would be a good husband, Elgar, but if we date, where will we go? What will we do?"

"So, how are you folks doing?" asked Adelle.

"Spinal and I have to be at the park at 2 p.m. sharp," Jenny told her.

"Well, I suggest you get your bottoms down there," Adelle said. "It's 1:50 p.m. sharp right now."

"What?" Jenny and Spinal looked at the clock. Adelle was right. They leaped out of their chairs and rushed out of the Surf Spot. C.C. followed.

The three ran to the park as fast as they could. They arrived with five minutes to spare.

"You're not gonna get me! You're not gonna get me!" Spinal screamed, leaping onto the picnic table. C.C. leaped right on top of him. "Okay, so I lied."

"Gimme those bones," C.C. commanded sweetly.

She placed her hands firmly on Spinal's ribcage and kissed him deeply and passionately. Then she stuck her hand inside his ribcage. Spinal instantly started squealing.

"Hey! Get your hand out of there! I'm ticklish in there!" he cried.

Jenny watched in confusion as Spinal and C.C.'s screaming laughter continued. They jumped up from the table, then C.C. chased Spinal in circles around it. Jenny took the opportunity to lie on the table. When Astronema and Elgar appeared out of nowhere, C.C. and Spinal leaped onto the table again, knocking Jenny off. Jenny hit the bench, then the ground. She looked up at Astronema.

"Astronema, funny you should catch us acting like idiots," she said.

"Funny, indeed," Astronema replied. "Ready for our duel, Spinal?"

"Uh, yeah," Spinal said, hopping off the table. "Just be careful with me though; I'm fragile."

With that, he fell apart at will. Jenny and C.C. chuckled softly. Elgar moved closer to Jenny. Jenny noticed that he had a rose taped to the left side of his chest.

"Elgar, you didn't have to get so dressed up just for little ol' me," she said.

Elgar pulled off the rose and handed it to her. "Hey, little miss, will you go out with me?"

"Sure, but it's not like we can go anywhere without scaring everybody," Jenny said.

"Oh, don't worry. I know just the place," Elgar told her. "It'll be great. Let's go."

"Just a second," Jenny said. "Spinal, pull yourself together."

"Okay." Spinal reassembled his skeletal structure.

"You will break her heart, won't you?" Jenny whispered into his ear. "And I do mean rip it out and tear it in half."

Spinal nodded.

"Okay, Elgar, I'm ready," Jenny said.

Elgar extended his hand. Jenny took it and they both vanished. Astronema looked at Spinal and smiled.

"Well, Spinal, let's get to it. But we can't fight here."

"Then where are we going?" Spinal asked.

"You'll see," Astronema said sweetly. She glared at C.C. "If I catch you interfering, I will take him for good."

"And if you do anything to hurt him, you're a dead woman," C.C. told her.

"What makes you think that I would hurt a sweet little guy like him?" Astronema asked.

"Well, you did kidnap him last time."

"Right. I kidnapped him; I didn't hurt him."

"C.C., you're holding things up, and I'd like to get this over with," Spinal interrupted. "And of course she has to hurt me; we're gonna fight."

"Okay, Spinal," C.C. said. "Please be careful. I'll never forgive myself if I lose you."

"Don't worry about me. I'll be fine," Spinal assured her. "Just go to the others and keep yourself occupied in some manner."

"Oh Spinal," C.C. gushed. "Anything can happen. Just in case . . . kiss me. Kiss me as if it were the last time."

Spinal turned to her and they locked in another passionate kiss. The tapping of Astronema's foot grabbed their attention after a moment. C.C. innocently waved and ran out. Spinal turned to Astronema and "swallowed" a throatful of nervousness. This was the first time that he'd actually been alone with her, and he couldn't help being nervous.

"Ready to go?" she asked.

"Ready and waiting," Spinal told her.

Suddenly, Astronema grabbed his wrist, startling him. Finally, they disappeared from the park.

Elgar took Jenny to a restaurant. Of course the other customers didn't get scared. The other customers included Rita Repulsa, Lord Zedd and their goons, the Machine Empire, and Divatox and her crew. Jenny was just plain shocked. She and Elgar sat at their own table. General Havoc approached both of them.

"I see your relationship is still going strong," he said.

"Yeah, it couldn't be better between us," Jenny said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Has she finally decided to marry you?" Havoc asked.

"Not yet. I decided to slow down a bit," Elgar explained. "A relationship is like a plant; it has to start from a seed, then grow gradually."

Jenny stared at him in confusion.

"I see," said Havoc. "Well, good luck."

He went back to join Divatox at the table. Jenny waved at him, then turned back to Elgar.

"Elgar . . . I've never seen this side of you," she said.

"That's why I asked you on this date, honey," Elgar told her. "There are things about me that you don't know. And I'm hoping to learn a lot more about you."

Jenny nodded in understanding as a Quantron came up to their table.

"Oh. Uh, yeah, we'll both have a large drink," Elgar said. "And I'll have fish and peanut butter on rye. Nothing for her, though; I'm sure she's not hungry right now. She was just at . . . uh, where do you and your pals hang out all the time?"

"The Surf Spot," Jenny told him.

"Oh yeah. Just get her a large special beverage. Thanks, buddy; you're the best."

Jenny couldn't help laughing. The Quantron walked off to carry out its orders.

"So, what should we talk about?" Elgar asked.

"Oh, I don't know," Jenny said.

"Oh, come on, there must be something. You know, we've known each other for almost a year, yet we've never really explored each other."

"Thank goodness."

"So why don't you tell me something about yourself?" Elgar suggested.

"Hmm . . ." Jenny thought for a moment. "Wanna hear about my past life?"

"Sure. That's a good start," Elgar replied.

"Okay." Jenny cleared her throat and began to tell the story about her horrifying past life . . .

Meanwhile, Astronema took Spinal to a mountaintop.

"Whoa! Where are we?" Spinal asked.

"It's just a mountaintop, Spinal. Nothing to be afraid of," Astronema replied. "Well, let's get this over with. I can't wait to make you mine."

"I don't belong to anyone," Spinal told her. "And what do you consider a defeat? Are we supposed to knock each other totally unconscious?"

"Either that or fight until the opponent surrenders."

So they stood several feet away from each other, Astronema with her staff and Spinal with his sword and shield. They began circling each other slowly. Since Astronema was so eager to catch Spinal as her one true love, she attacked him first. Spinal blocked her attacks with his shield, then poked her chest with his sword. Astronema brought her foot up and kicked Spinal squarely in the ribcage, sending him back. She advanced on him as he slowly got up. He remained on one knee, and when she was close enough, he brought his sword up, using his favorite crouching sword uppercut. That sudden move caught Astronema unawares. She stood up and charged at Spinal, who stopped her dead with a spin kick to her face. Astronema got up again and smiled at him.

"All right, Spinal," she said calmly. "You seem to be strong as a defensive fighter, but how good are you at offense?"

"Let's find out," Spinal replied.

He knew he had to be careful when fighting offensively. That last comment meant that Astronema would be waiting to counterattack. But he still had a hint of confidence, remembering Jenny's advice: Astronema doesn't know what you're capable of, which gives you an advantage.

Spinal leaped at Astronema and attempted a jump kick. It connected to her shoulder. Spinal landed and followed with a shield smash to the face and a slice to her other shoulder. He finished his combination by cutting her right leg, then her shoulder, then pummeled her stomach with his shield and drove his sword right into her, sending her flipping onto her chest. She lay there, motionless, but Spinal kept his distance.

"She can't be beaten already," Spinal said to himself. "She's devious; I can see it in her eyes. She wouldn't be defeated so easily, and she wouldn't give up."

Soon, Astronema began to stir...............

"My middle school years were the most horrifying and vivid," Jenny went on, still sitting at the table with Elgar. "In the seventh grade, the biggest and only problem was my PE class. Every day, this girl constantly walked up to me and said, 'Girl, you got a problem.' It was so annoying!"

"That did seem to be a problem for you," Elgar said.

"Yeah. When we were doing sports and the coach was monitoring another group, my classmates just shoved me away," Jenny explained. "I felt like Rudolph; they wouldn't let me play in any of their reindeer games. I went to a teacher for help. I said to her, 'Listen, I have a problem and I need help.' She just said, 'Of course you have a problem; it's middle school.' "

"Oh, that helped," Elgar said sarcastically.

"It sure did," Jenny replied, sharing his sarcasm. "I don't know how I ever got through that year. You know, I thought that things couldn't possibly get any worse when I got into the eighth grade. I couldn't have been more wrong!"

"How could things have been worse?"

"Ever hear of a bully? Well, there was this female bully named Sandy, and she was in several of my classes. She shoved me around whenever she got the chance. And with a school as horrible as that one, she got a lot of chances."

"She shoved you around? And it hurt?"

"Yes it hurt, Elgar! My feelings are so sensitive, it's unbelievable! It especially hurt when she shoved me into things, like a piano. She and her friends also yelled at me, threatened to kick my ass, and said, 'You deserve what the fuck you get!' "

Jenny sighed as tears started to flow from her eyes. Elgar was lost in thought. You could tell he was serious.

"To think that members from the same race would treat you like a sewer rat," he muttered. "I can't believe that you're actually telling me all this."

"Frankly, I don't like to talk about my past life," Jenny said. "But, Elgar, it was so horrible, I'm willing to tell anybody."

"So is that when you gathered all your miserable friends and committed suicide?" Elgar asked.

"How did you know about that?" Jenny asked.

"Ecliptor told me and Astronema."

"Oh, actually, I did go on to ninth grade before I made that move. I did move to another country in mid-eighth grade, so that was a little relief."

"That's nice," Elgar said. "So, end of story?"

"End of story. I have to keep it behind me," Jenny told him. "That was my life. This is my afterlife."

"Say, if you're zombies, how come you don't go walking around like this?" Elgar asked, doing the trademark zombie walk, which sent Jenny laughing. "And how come you don't go eating brains?"

"We don't do any of that because our brains still function," Jenny said. "However, we have been known to eat dead monsters every once in a while. But, you know, we eat regular food."

"There's something that puzzles me. I'm evil, you're good; yet we're dating, and we're sitting around the table together without killing each other. How could I possibly fall in love if I'm evil?"

"I've wondered about that too, and I've come to a conclusion. I was surprised that Astronema would fall in love with Spinal. On the other hand, I'm not surprised because Spinal is a very attractive and sexy little guy."

"Spinal, sexy!?" Elgar asked in shock.

Jenny paused, then laughed. "I'm getting off the subject, aren't I? Okay, why are we falling in love with our enemies? Well, Demon Spice once told us that there is good and evil in all of us. So, we're all basically good and evil, which is why we fall in love. Make sense?"

"Not really."

"Of course it wouldn't; not to someone with your IQ."

Just then, the Quantron came and placed a cluster of grapes in the center of the table. Elgar reached for them, but Jenny snatched them first.

"Hey, grapes, cool!" she cried.

"Hey, I want some!" Elgar whined.

Jenny stood up and edged away from the table. "Come and get 'em, Elgar!"

"Gimme those grapes!" Elgar shouted.

He leaped from the table and chased Jenny out of the room...............

Meanwhile, Spinal and Astronema were still duking it out on the mountaintop. Both were badly beaten, but both were still going strong. With several wipes of her stick, Astronema sent Spinal spinning backward. As Spinal stood up, Astronema grabbed his arm and twisted it, bending him over.

"Hmm, you are not easy to beat, are you?" she asked.

Spinal shook his head with a groan. He looked back at Astronema. He took his foot and hooked it behind hers, tripping her over and freeing himself. Astronema stood up and smiled.

"Look what I have," she said.

Astronema clutched Spinal's most prized possession in her hand --- his headband! Spinal grabbed his head and was stunned to find it missing. With a shrill cry, he lunged for Astronema and grabbed her wrist, trying to recover it. However, Astronema wouldn't let go. Spinal grabbed her fingers and tried to loosen her grip, but she just wouldn't give it back.

"Hey! Return my article of clothing!!" Spinal demanded.

Astronema was still being stubborn, so Spinal grabbed her shoulder and rolled back, tossing her directly over him. That worked; he recovered his headband. He stood up, slipped it back onto his skull, and tightened it as Astronema scrambled to her feet.

"Astronema!" Spinal cried. "Stop this immediately! You seem to be doing more playing than fighting, so this fight is over. What's come over you!? I'm leaving."

He started to walk off the mountaintop with Astronema glaring at him.

"I'm afraid you're not going anywhere," she said. "Quantrons!!"

Spinal gasped as he saw the Quantrons standing in various places down the hill. He turned to Astronema.

"Is this the typical response of a defeated opponent?" he asked. "Do you think they can stop me?"

"Well, I can be just like Speedy Spice," Astronema replied. "I can't forgive myself if I lose you either."

Spinal backed up from the slope tightly gripping his sword and shield. Then he ran toward the Quantrons. He tossed his shield forward, allowing it to slide on the ground. Spinal hopped onto the inside of the shield, sliding down the hill as if on a skateboard. Rather than standing straight up, Spinal took a crouching stance. As he neared the Quantrons, he curled up into a ball and tripped most of them over. However, there were still more up ahead. They fired lasers from the tips of their blades. Spinal swung his flaming sword to neutralize the lasers and protect himself. As he passed the Quantrons, he lashed out with his sword to slice them. One Quantron managed to shoot him on his left shoulder. Spinal cried out in pain and made extra sure to nail that guy. Once the Quantrons were cleared out, Spinal had some natural obstacles to face. The hill began to curve back and forth which made the ride a little more hairy. The hill went flat, then grew steep again suddenly, causing Spinal to fly through the air for a second.

"Whoooaaaa!!!" he screamed. He almost lost his balance upon landing, then continued down the hill.

All this time, Astronema had been walking down the hill past the litter of Quantrons. She watched as Spinal made his escape, but she still couldn't lose him. She aimed her staff at him and fired her powerful and stunning lasers. The resulting explosions sent Spinal flying from the ground, screaming. He hit the ground abruptly somewhere behind a set of large boulders. He was too stunned to get up.

"Oh . . . it's a good thing I'm already dead . . ." he muttered to himself................

Back at the other "date," Elgar raced into some living room only to find Jenny gone.

"Ah ha!" he yelled. "Ah . . . ha?"

He started to sneak out of the room, then Jenny snuck into the room from the staircase behind him. However, a nervous giggle unconsciously ripped out of her, grabbing Elgar's attention. They circled each other, a chair between them.

"Gimme those grapes!" Elgar demanded.

"No! No!!" Jenny ran around the chair with Elgar hot on her heels. She let out a piercing scream as Elgar caught up to her and wrapped his arms around her. They both fell onto the chair; the chair fell over, and they ended up on the floor.

"Okay," Elgar said, gasping for air. "Fun is fun, sugar, but I want those grapes. Gimme those grapes!!"

He started tickling Jenny's abdomen, which had her kicking and screaming.

"No; forget it!" she cried. "Oh, okay, I'll feed them to you."


They scrambled off the floor, pulled up a chair, and sat down.

"Open your mouth," Jenny said, picking a grape from the cluster.

Elgar opened his mouth.

"Close your eyes," Jenny added.

"Oh come on, baby," Elgar said. "I may have a low IQ, but I am not that stupid."

"Just close your eyes, Elgar."

Elgar closed his eyes.

"Ping!!!" Jenny threw the cluster of grapes in his face, then got up from her chair again. Elgar got up and chased her. When he caught her, he lifted her off the ground and carried her back to the chairs.

"My dream girl!" he shouted as he sat back down.

"Oh, Elgar, I just realized something," Jenny said.

"What's that?"

"You know, we've known each other for about a year now, right? My friends have been fighting you and your friends have been fighting me."

"Yeah. We've had a lot of fun, haven't we?" Elgar asked.

"Yeah, but, all this time, and you and I have never fought each other," Jenny told him. "Ever."

"Wait, wait, wait. Are you saying that you want to fight me?"

"Well . . . it would be nice. It would keep our relationship going."

"But, Tonfa Spice . . . I can't bring myself to hurt you. I love you."

"Elgar . . . would you hate me if I hurt you?"

"Never. I'll love you 'till the end of time, no matter what you do."

"So, come on, Elgar; let me fight you. I've been wondering if you're truly a formidable opponent."

"You know what's weird?" Elgar said. "I've been wondering if you were a formidable opponent, too."

"Well, let's go back to Angel Grove park and do a battle," Jenny suggested.

"You got it." Elgar took her hand and they disappeared from the room.

"Ow . . . what's going on? What's happened to me?" Spinal thought as he stirred from unconsciousness. He looked around; he was surprised and relieved to find himself still somewhere in the mountains. His weapons were lying nearby, which meant one thing.

"Astronema hasn't found me. Thank goodness."

Spinal reached out for his weapons when suddenly, the Quantrons leaped in front of him. Luckily, they didnít see him. They were still searching and they didnít bother to check behind them under the boulder. Spinal remained prone as they walked farther away. When they were far enough away, Spinal climbed out from under the boulder. However, he didnít see Astronema looking down on him from on top of the boulder. She leaped onto his back. Spinal struggled to get her off. He somersaulted forward, but that didnít work. Still on his feet, Spinal lowered his hands to the floor. Astronema rode him like a wild bull. Like a wild bull, Spinal threw his upper body upward in an attempt to throw her off. The first two attempts failed, but on his third leap, Astronema catapulted off, flipped several times and landed flat on her back. Astronema was still conscious, but she grabbed her head as if trying to contain an approaching explosion. Spinal stood over her condescendingly. He held his sword high above his head, then brought it down into Astronemaís body.

"Looks like I won," he said.

"What are you . . . talking about, dear boy?" Astronema asked weakly. "Iím still conscious. We must keep fighting."

"I donít think so. If thatís the case, Iíll just knock you out now."

Using the boulder for support, Astronema slowly pushed herself to her feet. Spinal backed up and brought his shield to his side. Blue energy began to gather in it. When the brilliant blue seemed to make him glow, Spinal thrust the shield forward, throwing a blue searing skull. As he rushed toward Astronema, it left a blue trail, and you could see its jaws opening and closing. Finally, the skull slammed into Astronema, knocking her back ten feet. Once she hit the ground, she lay motionless. Spinal sighed wearily, then stood over her again.

"Now leave me alone!" he cried. "This would never work out! Farewell, forever!"

With that said, Spinal began to set foot back to Angel Grove.

In Angel Grove park, Jenny and Elgar were duking it out. They were busy throwing numerous attacks at each other. After throwing a kick, Elgar got a punch in to Jennyís stomach. In response, Jenny gave him an elbow to the chest. Actually, it was the back end of her stick she hit him with. Elgar threw an overhead attack which Jenny blocked. Then Elgar forced her to her knee, pulled her wrist toward him, and pinned her body down. Luckily, Spinal arrived in Angel Grove quickly by skeleporting. He gasped when he saw Elgar and Jenny.

"I donít believe it! Youíre actually fighting!" he cried.

The other two paused.

"Uh-huh," Jenny replied innocently. Knowing that Elgar was distracted, she broke free from his grip and kicked him in the stomach. Then she backed up and joined Spinal. "Well, Elgar, Iíve had enough."

"Yeah, me too," Elgar replied. "Gotta go. Ta-ta."

He vanished quickly. Neither Jenny nor Spinal noticed the sky turning a creepy dark gray. Suddenly, they were greeted with a frightening thunderclap.

"Well, weíd better get to the Surf Spot before the storm hits," Spinal said.

Jenny nodded, then they started walking. "Well, Spinal, you made it through the day. Congratulations."

"Yeah. So, how was your . . . date?" Spinal asked.

"Well . . . Iíll tell you when we get there," Jenny replied. "Iím sure the others will want to know as well."


However, the storm hit before they reached the Surf Spot. When they got there, they were dripping. Adelle approached them.

"Whoo, you look a little wet," she said.

"A little wet!?" Jenny cried.

"Hang on; Iíll get you a towel," Adelle said with a chuckle.


A minute later, Adelle came back with the towels. Jenny and Spinal dried themselves eagerly. Then they joined their pals at the table.

"Well, well, how did it go?" asked the Cryptkeeper.

"I did it! I beat Astronema!" Spinal cried.

"Thatís nice, Spinal," Jenny said. "But donít be surprised if she does come after you again."

"Donít worry; I wonít be. Anyway, I got the upper hand, so Astronema called on the Quantrons. Then I pulled off a wild new escape tactic."

"Whatíd you do?" C.C. asked.

"I ride on my shield like a skateboard," Spinal said. "Also during the fight . . ."

He paused for effect.

"Yes?" the others asked eagerly.

Spinal pulled off his headband and looked at it sadly. "Iíve had this headband ever since I was resurrected. And Astronema tried to take it from me," he sobbed.

"Well, you still have it," the Cryptkeeper told him. "Be happy."

"I beat her," Spinal said.

"Okay, Jenny, howíd your date go?" the Cryptkeeper asked.

Jenny was hesitant to answer. She was smiling. "Oh, it was great. We . . . had a nice time." She lowered her head as she spoke, as if in shame.

"What did you do?" Spinal asked.

"First we sat around and talked. I told him all about my past life . . ."

"How did he react?" C.C. asked.

"He was shocked. Why would a nice girl like me be treated like shit? Anyway, right after that, we flirted around a bit."

"And then they got into a fight," Spinal interrupted.

"Yes, we went into battle," Jenny said. "Heís one hell of a fighter."

"Wow! Youíve encountered that guy for a year, yet youíve never actually fought him!" the Cryptkeeper said.

"Yeah, wooptie do," Jenny muttered.

"Hey, Jenny, thereís someone who wants to see you out back," Adelle called.

"Okay." Jenny walked over to the back door and opened it. She gasped upon seeing her visitor --- Elgar. She suddenly lost all strength in her legs and sank into his arms.

"Whoa, take it easy," Elgar said.

"Elgar, what are you doing here!?" Jenny cried.

"I just wanted to tell you what a great time I had," Elgar replied.

"Oh yeah . . . I had fun myself."

"I told you I wouldnít make a bad husband."

"Well . . . I never doubted it."

"So . . . will you marry me?"

"Elgar, I canít marry you," Jenny told him. "Remember, Iím only sixteen years old. And since Iím dead, Iím stuck at sixteen for all eternity. I canít get married at all."

"Well . . . I heard that you can get married at your age with your parentsí permission," Elgar said.

"Elgar . . . my parents are dead too," Jenny said. "They no longer exist."

"Oh man," Elgar cried, slapping his head. "Okay, tell me this. Would you marry me if you were old enough?"

Jenny laughed. "Uh . . . Iíll have to get back to you on that."

"Well, I gotta go," Elgar said. "Love ya, baby."

"Um . . . I . . . I love you too, Elgar."

Without another word, Elgar vanished. Jennyís eyes widened.

"I canít believe I just said that!" she said to herself.

She walked back into the Surf Spot and joined her friends again.

"So, who was it?" the Cryptkeeper asked.

"It was Elgar," Jenny replied. "He wanted to tell me what a great time he had."

"You had a great time, too; you know it," the Cryptkeeper said.

"Yes; I told you that. Well, Spinal, I guess youíll end up loving Astronema eventually."

"Uh-uh," Spinal said. "That dirty nag doesnít spell love to me. I found me a nice girl; someone who can love me without torturing me."

"Well, it all comes with being cute and sexy," Jenny said. "Being a Spice can add to the pain and pleasure."

"I know. We are the cutest fighting force out there, arenít we?" asked the Cryptkeeper.

"Totally. Itís also amazing how we go out there and release all hell on the forces of evil," C.C. added.

"Thatís the fun part," Jenny said. "Oooh, murder!"

And the Spice Club wins another victory. Again, theyíve endured the pain while having a good time. Love will also always triumph. Yet the question remains: What is love?

The End... for now